Many of us grew up with mothers or grandmothers who echoed fears around the physical signs of getting older — pulling their skin tight to compare their faces to their younger selves, and pointing out grey hairs and dark circles out of fear that someone else might first.
The media we consumed taught us that growing old was something to be dread rather than be grateful for. In When Harry Met Sally, Sally exclaims “And I’m gonna be 40!” Despite the milestone birthday being eight years away, the thought of turning 40 is presented as simply terrifying. Sally is genuinely concerned about her fleeting youth, and associated desirability.
Young women now are plagued by social media posts, ads, and media tropes encouraging them to invest in anti-ageing creams and wrinkle-reducing treatments. Reports of young girls strolling Sephora looking for skincare to hold on to their ‘youthful glow’ for as long as they can fill our feeds.
But why do women in particular experience this? Why are we so seemingly scared of ageing? Will we always feel this way?
The answer is apparently not. While we spend decades of our lives insecure about our changing features, the senior women around us are far more okay with their ageing faces and bodies than what we are led to believe.
In fact, a 2018 survey by the American Association of Retired Persons found that the majority of women feel misrepresented by mainstream media, and actually feel more comfortable in their skin as they age.
Titled “Mirror/Mirror: AARP Survey of Women’s Reflections on Beauty, Age, and Media”, the study surveyed 2000 women from ages 21 to 72.
It found that 61 per cent of women surveyed said they do not feel represented by images of women in media, and 50 per cent are annoyed by heavy airbrushing used on models. The majority of respondents — over 70 per cent — wish ads used more realistic images of women.
Arguably, the strongest sentiment that comes through in this study is that despite media representations of women depicting ageing as an inherently negative thing, most women do not see it that way as they age, and women of all ages wish these representations were more accurate.
Over 60 per cent of women said they feel beautiful at any age, and most baby boomer-aged women feel more free when it comes to how they dress — 72 per cent of boomers said they feel free to dress how they want, compared to 61 per cent of Generation X and millennials.
Boomers also more commonly agreed with the statements “I am kinder to myself about my body as I age,” and “I celebrate my body as I age.”
There is no denying the double standard that exists for ageing women when compared to men.
In a study by the Geena Davis Institute, a research body for diversity in film, TV, and advertising, it was found that in the decade spanning 2010-2020, characters aged over 50 constituted less than a quarter of all characters in blockbuster films and TV shows.
Of those characters, males significantly outnumbered females, making up 80 per cent of characters aged 50+ in films, 75 per cent in broadcast TV, and 66 per cent in streaming platforms.
It also found that romantic storylines were disproportionately lower for this age group, with younger characters being two to three times more likely to feature in romantic narratives.
Characters aged over 50 often leaned more towards villainy than heroism. All of this unfortunately contributes to the negative stereotypes of ageing women as undesirable and irrelevant.
The beauty industry, and its associated advertisements and online content, are also to blame. The global anti-ageing market was valued at around 62 billion U.S. dollars in 2021, and is expected to increase to 93 billion by 2027.
Big beauty brands are capitalising off the insecurities of women of all ages, and feeding them ‘solutions’ and ‘preventatives’ in the forms of serums, creams, oils, supplements and devices like LED masks. Advertisements for these products tell consumers “it’s time to press rewind,” and that products will get skin to “behave young again”.
Social media is undoubtedly a culprit when it comes to this issue too — women and young girls alike are exposed to endless content about skincare and the importance of anti-ageing.
Beauty hauls, morning routines, and nighttime skincare regimens are at the fingertips of every social media user — and almost every one of them in some way encourages the purchasing and use of the featured products.
None of this is to say that progress isn’t being made. Beauty giant Dove recently shared its ‘10 vs 10’ campaign, highlighting the rapid growth and problematic nature of anti-ageing content on girls’ feeds that influences them to invest time, money, and energy into anti-ageing routines.
In the TV world, shows like Grace and Frankie are changing mainstream perceptions of senior women, portraying them as fun, interesting characters, with important and fruitful lives.
So, we know that women actually feel more confident as they age, but we also know that young women all over the world are terrified of ageing, largely due to inaccurate media representation across film, TV, and the beauty industry.
We know the dangers of low self esteem, the financial costs of committing to an anti-ageing regimen, and the reality that the fears many women feel (although not their fault) are largely rooted in misguided stereotypes about how they will feel if they allow themselves to show their age.
If you’re a woman or girl of any age and finding yourself wondering how to love your face and ageing body, ask yourself why you don’t already. Insecurities, to some degree, are normal, but try not to let unfair stereotypes and media representations lead you to believe you are of any less value because your appearance is changing.
While the onus should not fall on women, we are in a time when the reality of ageism in media, and in society, exists, and it is important that we do what we can in ourselves, for ourselves.
As individuals, we can’t fix a broken system of misogyny or ageism, and it would be unreasonable to expect or pretend that these systems never affect our self-esteem, but we can take small steps, in our circles and in ourselves, to dismantle the ideas that have been pushed upon us our whole lives.
Strip back the makeup on days you can’t be bothered, wear the shirt you haven’t worn in a decade even though it makes you feel good — or don’t do these things. Whichever decision you make, just try to make it for yourself.
